#203 of 365 – “melee”




like thunder

breaks into my bones


with a rain

of crushing consequences

heavy like stones


I am a liar

through denial

and blatant omission


my trustworthiness

a ghost,

an unstable apparition


I linger,

haunt inside

a frightening nether


of unwillingness

or inability

to stand and weather


the melee

of my godlessness

and mobs of disbelief


that hammer down

this love

until it’s tortured into grief




About Blackbird

Poet, sculptor, jewelry maker, writer, spouse, parent, crazy person - not necessarily in that order.
This entry was posted in Addict Behavior, Addiction, Betrayal, Compulsive Spending, Cowardice, Depression, Despair, disappointment, Failure, Hitting Bottom, Lessons, love, Marriage, Poetry, Recovery, Regret, Self-Destructive, Spouse and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to #203 of 365 – “melee”

  1. Starralee says:

    WOW, the power in this is immeasurable and intense. I feel that my comments must seem so redundant, but I’m blown away that you can continue to bring us the “big guns”, poetically. I do hope you’re publishing a book. Another whispered “wow”, as I shake my head, marveling.

    • Blackbird says:

      Starralee…I am immensly(don’t know if I spelled that right) grateful for your readership and comments – which never ever feel redundant to me. The support I get through this blog is sometimes…often…all that gets me through the day, other than trying to get better and be a better person for my family…which as you can tell, I often fail miserably at.

      I am always appreciative of anything you have to say….so(not to sound redundant)…but…a heartfelt, bone-deep thank you!

      • Starralee says:

        I admire your tremendous courage–getting better is hard work, and to do it with the goal of being a better person for your family….wow, I can’t even begin to imagine. Please know that I pray for you daily, and I send my love to you with a confidence that your story is going to be a victorious example for others who are trying to get better–whatever that means to them. That you have family is significant–some of us, like myself, must make the most of life while permanently estranged from those who were once family. Without knowing you, I think you’re wonderful–and your writing is spectacularly stunning every time out. We can stand together–even at a distance.

      • Blackbird says:

        I am deeply touched beyond words. You are in my prayers as well. Thank you Starralee…you have a sister…even at a distance.

      • Starralee says:

        Ohhh, that means so much to me tonight. Thank you.

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